I usually am not a big fan of the holidays. I don’t like my family and my mother and father get worn out all the time trying to cook and make everyone comfortable. With all the family drama and chaos there usually is no time to enjoy the holidays. Luckily this year my aunt and uncle came up with a fun game to deal with certain people in the family, like my fundamental evilangelist of a grandmother. I would like to share that game with you in hopes to possibly provide some laughs.

Do you have family members that:

• Push their woo/Religious agenda on you and others?
• Talk about nothing but one specific topic?
• Complain about everything?
• Obnoxiously drink too much?
• Are generally just unpleasant for some particular reason?

If you answered “yes” to any of the following and have large family gatherings, this game is for you.

Materials:

• Either a napkin or handkerchief of sorts. It is to be used as a penalty flag.
• A handful of trusty family members to get the joke and play along.

Rules:

So the name of the game is “Flag on The Play.” The object of the game is to throw your napkin or whatever random object you use as your “flag” up whenever your family member exhibits an unwanted behavior. You can let everyone know about the game but this is ill advised. I suggest getting a small group of people in your family that may be annoyed by your targets, set rules on what behaviors get the “flag.” The game can be hilarious. As an example, if my grandmother pushed her agenda the people in on the game would silently throw up their napkins. Now our family is strange so my grandmother thought nothing of it. The game is fun and everyone laughs and does not feel as disgusted with the unwanted behavior. Note that this may not work in some families, and works best in large families where multiple things are going on at the same time. Please try to avoid huge fights and hurt feelings. Have fun! May your holiday season be full of reason!

I live in south New Jersey. I want to tell you the things I like about South Jersey:

• I like Governor Jon Corzine.
• We live next to Delaware. I like no sales tax.
• Corzine promised to pass a bill allowing Gay marriage before his term is up. I like that.
• We have good pizza. I like pizza.
• We get fresh seafood. I like seafood.
• If Corzine can sign the bill into law before January 19^th the mean un-American people who are against same sex marriage will have to wait until the next state legislative elections in 2011 to fight back. I like that.
• I like the Jersey Shore!!!
• If the all-American bill is approved and grants me my civil rights, New Jersey would become the sixth state to allow gay marriage. I like that.

Things I don’t like about South Jersey:

• I don’t like Governor Jon Corzine’s successor Chris Christie. He is un-American. He promises to veto any bill legalizing gay marriage. I don’t like that.
• The Jersey shore has recently been used as reality show on MTV. Its not reality. I don’t like that.
• A planned Senate vote is being delayed to allow for the Assembly’s Judiciary Committee to hold a hearing about the gay marriage bill. It’s up against a time limit. I don’t like the odds.
• I don’t like car insurance. It’s expensive.

In 1954 president Eisenhower signed a bill including the phrase “under God” in the pledge of allegiance since then there has been controversy in schools about it. Now fifth grader Will Phillips is refusing to say the pledge because of the phrase “liberty and justice for all.” When asked why he refused to honor an American tradition Will said,

“Well, I looked at the end and it said ‘with liberty and justice for all.’ And there really isn’t liberty and justice for all. Gays and lesbians can’t marry. There’s still a lot of racism and sexism in the world.”

If a fifth grade boy can stand up for my rights, why can’t everyone else? How can people who advocate against same sex marriage consider themselves American? Didn’t we learn this lesson already? Something about it being unconstitutional to deny  equal rights for black people and women? I guess not.

With that I leave you with my own more realistic pledge:

I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united but hypocritical states of America. And to the Republic for which it stands false, one nation ignoring it’s own constitution, under the people, with liberty and justice for some.

Coming out was very easy for me. I had already gone through the same thing coming out as an atheist. The only hard part was the fact that my mother took it very hard. She is still struggling with the fact that her daughter likes to have sex with women.

Anyway, I found this great video a friend posted on facebook. It discusses the coming out stage for a young atheist. The video is well done and perfect for young teens struggling with their philosophical identity.

Interestingly, the entire time I was watching it I could not help but think that the same advice is given to gay teens. Now watch the video and tell me what you think. Is there much of a difference between the process of coming out as a member of the LGBT community and coming out as an atheist?

First of all, I apologize for not blogging at all but I have had some family issues that have pulled me away from my usual blogging schedule. However the drug addict is out of my house and the rest of the family is just sitting around waiting for my uncle to buy the farm. So, it’s all quiet on my front, and that means I need to make some noise. That said…

There is hope! So there is this amazing website that I am sure you guys have heard of called Conservapedia. Anyway, I found out from this website, that is supposed to be “the trustworthy encyclopedia,” that I don’t have to be gay! Since it’s a choice I am going to be straight riiiggghhht NOW!

…

*Concentrates really hard on being straight, but the thought is eventually overpowered by this.*

Well, I am still gay… So now what? I know! I will check Conservapedia! They will tell me what to do!

*vigorously reads the ferociously biased, homophobic, ignorant website.*

Ahhh! I found of a list of things to do as a young gay person! Actually, it’s more like an agenda…

1. Destroying Christian morals.

Changing the definition of marriage, even if doing so infringes on the religious rights of Christians not to recognize it as anything other than sin.

2. Promote pseudoscience that legitimizes homosexuality, such as claims of a never-identified gay gene. (2. “promoting real science that indicates that sexual orientation is not a choice.”)

Censoring evidence that the “gay gene” is a hoax.

3. Censoring speech against homosexuality by branding it to possibly be “hate-speech”

Censoring biblical statements condemning homosexuality.

4. Establishing affirmative action for homosexuals

5. Expand hate crimes legislation to include sexual orientation.

6. Ending the military’s and Boy Scout’s restrictions on homosexuality.

7. Stopping children as young as 5 years old from attending therapy to repair their sexual preference.

8. Promote homosexuality in schools.

In places like Massachusetts and California, where the gay lobby is the strongest, it starts as early as pre-school. They tell seven- or eight-year-old boys, “If you only like boys, there’s a chance you may be homosexual,” or “If you only like girls, maybe you are lesbian.” Well, at that age, all members of the opposite sex “have cooties.”

You’re planting a seed that can totally mess up the normal development process later, when at 12 or 14, kids enter the age of sexual confusion and discovering the opposite sex.

9. Force businesses to accommodate their lifestyle

Suing an online dating website for discrimination

10. Undermining the resolve of latent homosexuals so that their will becomes too weak to resist the temptations of homosexuality.

11. Pushing for legalized adoption by gay individuals and couples.

So… Any of you guys want to help me with any of this? It looks hard and time consuming. But, I am crossing out number one because I feel that people have the right to believe I am a sinner. And I am going to go ahead and change number two to “promoting real science that indicates that sexual orientation is not a choice.” Also, I don’t know what number four means. Affirmative action? Does that mean sex? If so I’m on it! In fact, we should all go do that one first…